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| Blogs > 40Deuce > Sherry Stringfield's ass in 93 |
1985 - The Year in Movies
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1985 - The Year in Movies 'Way before Nirvana There was U2 and Blondie And music still on M-T-V' I'm not sure I've ever heard someone use the word distaff when speaking - I've only ever seen it in print . Use it 12 or more times this week and you'll have good luck . Wolf - Mildly boring for a movie about a teenage werewolf . Act 1 - Oh no I'm a werewolf ! Act 2 - Now I'm popular ! Act 3 - I don't need to be a werewolf to be happy and I'll<b> bang </font></b>this chick with the weird name instead of the popular girl . I can't remember why didn't the dad tell Michael Keaton that he was a werewolf ? I want to say he thought maybe it would skip a generation . But wouldn't that be worse if you didn't know werewolves were a thing and your was one ? Now THAT'S a movie . Rating - 2 Cabbage Patch . Gotcha ! - The dude from ER and his buddy run around shooting at each other with paintball guns that look like real guns and its 1985 so people just shake their fist at them instead of the police killing them with real real guns . That's pretty much all I remember except that something this leads to Dr. Green getting involved with spies and assassins and such . How did his character leave ER ? Did he die ? I feel like he died . Rating - 2 Cabbage Patch . King Solomon's Mine - I believe this movie claimed to be just like Indiana Jones , which as an adult I realize is typical not a good thing when someone claims to be like something popular but I was 8 and I loved Indy so it worked like a charm . This movie was pretty awful . That's literally all I remember about it . Rating - New Coke . Transylvania 6-5000 - I . Freaking . LOVED this movie . Because are morons . I assume this one is not real high on Geena Davis or Jeff Goldblum's resumes . But hey it made 4 million dollars which in 1985 . . . . was still not very good . What does Geena Davis look like these days ? Does she still look alright or is she getting a good spanking from father time ? Rating - 4 Billie Jean King's Glasses Back to the Future - Back to the Future and Wolf came out in the same year ? What kind of nonsense is that ? They must have been by different studios . Pretty good movie , I mean Lea Thompson ain't hard on the eyes you know ? Is movie was nominated for OSCARS . That's carrying it a bit far if you ask me . I have a buddy who insists this is the greatest movie of all time and the trilogy the best franchise . The second one was okay , the third was garbage - as per usual for sequels . As you all know I despite the standard Hollywood message of "stand up to bullies and you get top<b> bang </font></b>a hot chick" because in my experience standing up to bullies gets you stabbed with a fork . Rating - 3 Mc DLTs Fletch - Now we're talkin' ! I keep meaning to read the books but for some reason I never get around to it . This movie is fantastic and I will fight anyone who says otherwise . I do wonder though is this one of those movies that only guys like or does it have a broader appeal ? Now that I know that Chevy Chase is a legit asshole I have to downgrade it a little but still this is a damn funny movie . Rating - 5 Elle McPhersons Ewoks - The Battle for Endor - A sad moment in my childhood when I realized that Star Wars could suck . Hard . You have NO idea how excited I was new Star Wars content . And this turd is what they served up . Rating - Negative a million Greedo's shooting first Better Off Dead - Aw snap ! Fletch may have a contender for the king of 1985 - BTW who was the king of 1985 ? Is John Cusack aging gracefully or was he 12 when he made this movie ? This movie is dope but I won't fight you over it because I can see how it wouldn't be everyone's cup of Nestea Ice Tea . This by a wide margin the movie I've seen the most times on this list . I should own it . Rating - 5 Run DMCs Spies Like Us - Two Chevy Chase pictures in the same year also ? Maybe that was a thing back then . Good flick . And I know there's zero point in worry about the plot of a goofball comedy but even as a lad I couldn't help thinking "wouldn't it make more sense to use actual agents who know what's up as the decoys ?" 40 million box office gross - that's gonna buy you a bunch of Nintendos . Rating - 5 Teddy Ruxpins A View to a Kill - Roger Moore was in this ? I could have sworn it was Timothy Dalton . Shows what I know . Was this the first time I had seen a black person ? Probably not but that's what sticks out to me . I was not terribly impressed with this movie - I believe my family banished me from the room after the first big chase scene because I kept saying "come on , that's ridiculous !" 120 million box office gross that's nothing to sneeze at . Does it even matter when it comes to Bond movies are they just a license to print money ? I still haven't seen any of the Daniel Craig one's , I hate that guy . I wrote a screenplay about a dude learning to pass himself off perfectly as a woman in order to seduce and kill Bond - because no actual woman could resist his charms and would back out at the last second . Act 3 was decent . Rating - 1 Duran Duran Desperately Seeking Susan - I loved Madonna movies when I was a . I was shocked when I got older and found out she WASN'T considered to be a good actress . I didn't know she was a singer until later also - I was kind of a dumb . I have no idea which one this was - they all kind of blend together . The internet tells me it was actually consider one of the best movies of the year though which is surprising I thought all of the Material Girl's work was considered to be the worst . Rating - 3 Who's That Girls Brazil - I didn't see this movie until I was an adult so maybe it doesn't count but it is great . One thing that confused me though is there seems to be different versions - I think there's the original depressing ending and then maybe they changed it to a happy stupid ending like they do sometimes ? Not sure . If you like your grim dystopian visions of the future with a little comedy this is the movie for you . Rating - 4 Monty Pythons Volunteers - Even though they're only mildly alike - slacker leaves the country to get away from their stupid life - I often get this movie confused with Stripes . Which is a bummer because it's decent enough but it's not as good as Stripes . I think they told me in college that this movie is what started product placement . Also I feel like maybe this is the movie where Tom Hanks met his wife ? It's no Splash I tell you that much . Rating - Two and a half John Candys And I would be remiss if I talked about 1985 without mentioning WrestleMania - the event that saved/ruined the wrestling industry forever and made Vince McMahon as rich asshole instead of just a normal asshole . Remember that time the president of the United States shaved his head on PPV ? Remember ? I wont bore you with my in-depth analysis of WrestleMania as a concept and the ascension of the WWF/E to power and it's effects on the industry but I will bore you with a match by match breakdown . We started with Gene Oakerlund singing the National Anthem because the celebrity that was supposed to do it didn't show up . The person has never been named which is odd because that seems like the kind of thing that would have come out by now . Not a great way to start off - say what you will about Lilian Garcia she can belt out the anthem like a pro when she needs to . Next up Tito Santana defeated Buddy Rose (as the Executioner) in short order with the figure four leglock . Not much of a match but decent enough . I cringe now ever time I hear Jesse Venture call him "chico" Santana . Maybe that's not as racist as I think . King Kong Bundy then crushed Special Delivery Jones in 8 seconds . Even though I know better ever time I hear the name Special Delivery Jones I think porn star . For a long time this was the record as the shortest match ever - which was the point of the whole thing . I wish it still was . Another quick match wherein Ricky "the Dragon" Steamboat defeated Matt Osborn in under five minutes . People LOVE to complain about the pacing of the modern product being too fact but we've had 3 matches in like 10 minutes here . WWF actually had a pretty thin roster at the time I'm not sure they had much choice . Steamboat is rightfully acknowledged as one of the best babyface wrestlers of all time but he had a pretty short run in WWF although this WM 3 match with Randy Savage is regarded as one of the best matches ever . Still though he lost the IC title to the Honky Tonk Man so . . . you know . Osborn would later go on to be Doink the Clown - the good one . Then David Sammartino and Brutus Beefcake wrestled 12 minutes to a double disqualification . Ugh . These two jokers are given 12 minutes when Santana and Steamboat don't get that combined ? This should have been a good signal of what the WWE would become . I had forgotten that Bruno Sammartino's tried to be a wrestler - and with good reason . And Beefcake was a joke , he's actually a nice guy but his entire career exist only because he was friends with Hulk Hogan . This was the Ewok movie of the card . Next up the Junkyard and Greg Valentine for the Intercontinental title . Pretty good match , ended with JYD winning the match but not the belt by count-out . Standard heel move . If you haven't watched the Rock on SNL as "the Scrapyard Mutt" you should . I don't usually like it when they have wrestlers do wrestling skits in SNL but that one is pure gold . After that we get Nikolai Volkoff and The Iron Sheik taking the tag belts from The U.S. Express . Mildly shocking to have the hells go over and become the champions - I feel like Rotunda and Windham left the company right after this so perhaps that's why . Decent enough match . I'm noticing that almost everyone has a manager or a buddy or someone at ring with them - I wonder why they don't do that anymore . Probably too expensive to pay someone just to come down to the ring and get involved in one spot . Andre the Giant against Big John Studd in a $15,000 body slam challenge . These two feuded for a long time , a LONG time , and barely ever had a match - it was mostly shenanigans like this but it was entertaining for all that . Andre slams Studd and starts throwing the money to the crowd before Bobby Heenan grabs the money sack and runs off . Was it real money ? I don't know . Also grabbing the money sack should be a term for some kind of sex maneuver . Wendi Richter became the women's champion by defeating Leilani Kai . Cindi Lauper was involved in this . I wonder if she's a wrestling fan at all or if this was just a gig . She doesn't seem like the type to be into wrestling but she also doesn't seem the type to take a gig like this . It's perplexing . Leilani Kai still wrestles sometimes despite being in her late 50s . So think about that . After that we have the so-called Main Event Hulk Hogan and Mr. T in tag action against Roddy Piper and Paul Orndorf . Also Muhammad Ali was there and for some reason Liberace ? So yeah M. T couldn't really wrestle and neither could Hogan for that matter whereas on the other side you had two great workers so it was kind of a cluster . As a spectacle people were into it but as a match it was weak ass . I mean the world title isn't even defended at the first Mania of wrestling ? What's that about ? This was Piper at his best though , he did more to sell this event and make is a success than anyone else on the card I would argue . Bonus fun fact - Mr. Fuji was apparently banging whores 3-5 at a time all day leading up to the event . Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
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Extra bonus fun fact in 1985 Courtney Cox became the first person to ever say "period" on TV referring to menstruation . She was sentenced to 7 years in jail . Putting clients first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put clients (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.
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I saw that 1985 version of King Solomon's Mines .... but totally blocked it from my memory until NOW. Thanks a lot 40! *sarcastic font* You should try the 1950 Stewart Granger version. Did you know Patrick Swayze did a remake in 2004? Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!
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Daniel Craig sucks as Bond, maybe a gorilla could take the part next. When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
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I was cruising along with this post and then after "Wrestlemania" the rest of it was blah blah blah Ginger. If Dr. Green was the tall blonde nerdy one, yes he died, it was quite the tearjerker episode. I remember enjoying Better off Dead, it might be time to scrounge that one up somewhere and re-view it. Desperately Seeking Susan was a fave as well since I viewed myself as "edgy" like the Madonna character - pretty funny in retrospect.   
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Are you serious about Lauper? You don't remember the relationship with David Wolff? The Rock/Wrestling Connection? I can't believe you don't have an entire entry about the Goonies R Good Enough video. Embrace the suck
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Oh, and I'll have a steak sandwich...and a steak sandwich. Just put in on Mr. Underhill's account... Embrace the suck
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