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| Blogs > juanbig1 > My Blog |
Perfectionist or merely Anal?
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Perfectionist or merely Anal? That'd be my neighbor. He's a text book perfectionist and his wife is a magnet for every disease currently advertised on TV. Now by "perfectionist" I mean he only stops short of grooming his lawn with a hair brush. Rain or shine he mows and edges every three days. The tulips have fallen out of bloom now and once the last petal fell he was trimming them down. He's put down weed killer, flea killer, dandelion killer, fertilizer (three different kinds) and just about every other chemical the Home Depot tells him works best. He spends hours pulling the dead blooms off the Rhoadies and the marigolds and whatever else has petals. Absolute perfection. Wellllll, almost. There's a small creature here in Washington that remains the nemisis of most lawn professionals in spite of their valient attempts. That would be the MOLE. They are known for making those wonderful little mounds of earth in random patterns on the finest of lawns and golf courses. For the five years I've lived here, my good neighbor has been blessed with a 'no mole' lawn while the rest of us have had sporadic infestations. I don't think that's fair. Soooo, late last night I introduced him to the same malady we endure. No, I didn't transplant moles to his yard. Better yet...I took a bag of potting soil and made half a dozen little "mole hills" in random patterns on his lawn. heh, heh, heh! Yep, I let my pup out about an hour ago while I sat outside having a morning cup of coffee and out wanders the neighbor with his dogs. Of course we exchanged the typical pleasantries...mornin', mornin'......say there, looks like you're having a bit of a problem with moles neighbor? (God I'm a prick) His reaction has been nothing less than spectacular. In a frenzy he grabbed a rake and began to smooth out the mounds and probe for holes.....I suspect he's expecting Better Homes and Gardens to photo op his place any moment. Maybe I should call Home Depot and tell them to put on extra staff cause I know good and well he'll be there when the door opens. This is too good. And I still have 20 pounds of top soil left..............there's always tonight. heh, heh, heh......yep, I'm a prick alright. Regards Will Sex is kinda like air......it ain't all that important till you're not gettin' any |
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