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| Blogs > myelin36 > Dirty Little Secrets |
Increasing Frequency of Sex Does Not Predict Increased Happiness
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Increasing Frequency of Sex Does Not Predict Increased Happiness Imagine that you started having sex twice as often as you were right now. How do you think you would feel? Although most people would probably assume that their happiness would increase, they might not necessarily be correct. How could that be? It's just common sense that more sex = more happiness, isn't it? As it turns out, we tend to be pretty bad at predicting our future emotional states. Called affective forecasting, essentially this means that you won't know how you'll feel about a given situation until you're in it. So what actually happens when people start increasing the frequency with which they have sex? Does it truly make them happier? At first glance, this advice would seem to be supported by science. Repeated studies have found a positive correlation between relationship satisfaction and sexual frequency, meaning that the happiest couples tend to be the ones who have the most sex. Taking a cue from the research may not have the desired effect in this case, though. Researchers published a study in the Journal of Economic Behavior & Organization (a seemingly unlikely place for a sex study), where 128 male-female married couples participated. To be eligible for the study, the partners had to be free of chronic health conditions and not currently have any sexual problems. On average, participants were in their mid-40s, mostly white, college-educated and on their first marriage. The couples were having sex about 5-6 times per month as a baseline. Couples were assigned to two different groups. Those who were instructed to increase their sexual frequency did so, but doubling it seemed difficult to achieve. On average, sexual frequency increased about 40 percent in this group. Surprisingly, however, an increase in sexual frequency did not translate to an increase in happiness. In fact, just the opposite was observed. The couples who increased their sexual frequency were less happy than the control group for all three months of the study. So why weren’t couples who had more sex happier in the end? Researchers concluded that doubling instructions “affected the couples’ intrinsic motivation to have sex.” In other words, perhaps sex went from being a voluntary and spontaneous thing to something that became more planned and obligatory. So, it would seem that the key to increasing happiness lies not in the frequency of sexual encounters but in spontaneity of sexual encounters and increasing intimacy through removal of emotional roadblocks. Interesting stuff. What do you think? Do you feel the results of the study are valid?  |
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As the punchline to the old joke goes... "So the rabbi says 'Sex is definitely play, not work. If it were work, my wife would make the maid do it!'" I dunno, being put on a schedule and then being required to jump up and fill out a questionnaire after every time I have sex would probably dampen my ardor, as well... Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic
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When sex becomes more work then fun, then more sex would not mean more happiness. Also, it is what each person gets out of it. Sex between two people is not a simple thing for measuring. Cum to my blog and respond.  Have a great kissing fun time. 
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When it comes to sex, quantity does not equate to quality..... 
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It seems to me that this question is answered by exploring it a different way; can a sexless relationship be a happy relationship? Smart as a horse and hung like Einstein.
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I absolutely agree with the study. Once the basic need is met of getting off once a day or so, it only becomes "good" when theres more to it. Aut viam inveniam aut faciam Tips for Guys to Meet Women  Things i miss most about relationships
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I think the explanation lies in "instructed to increase their sexual frequency". If you're told to do it, even if you don't want to do it, then it becomes a chore. If your circumstances change so that you want to do it more, and any obstacles are removed (tiredness, worries, kids, work the next day, we all know what gets in the way), then I'm sure your happiness will increase. Maybe the real problem is that a life balance that precludes more sex is a cause for unhappiness... Cause and effect 
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Great topic. Sex is nothing if you don't have the desire. It's like eating. And what is eating if you are not hungry? Thus, you need to want it, crave it, and have it when the moment is right. When your body requires it of you. It's the only way you can enjoy it.
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