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| Blogs > im_soaking_wet > Sessions with Soaking |
Taking the Plunge
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Taking the Plunge This post is only viewable by TSmeet members. Join TSmeet now! |
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While I couldn't speak of success in a date from here, there does seem to be an increase in ladies in the last 6-12 months looking for a longer term beau. So you definitely aren't alone in your thought. However, you still have to wade into the waters of sorting out the trolls that message you to death, and perhaps changing some of your preferences. From something that will get you off tonight, vs something more long term. It's not too hard to pick a longer term guy than the Hottie of the Day. But once again, that's as a guy, we know how to ferret out our own evil.
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I've been on here, and other similar sites for a few years, as well as the main dating sites and I have to say I've had more meaningful relationships with women from these kind of sites. There's more openness in terms of what we're after and the physical needs are out there from the start. With regard to the relationships I've had from here, they've started as casual and then progressed naturally to more monogamous relationships, what I found is that there isn't so much of the possessiveness or 'eagerness' for it to be something special or long term from the start. The only thing I would suggest you could do is state in your profile you're looking for something more substantial- you'll still get the usual hopeful and desperate guys messaging, but as you're aware, the regular messaging and social meets will hopefully weed out the chancers from the potentials.
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Nothing wrong with being upfront about your wants/needs. If you would like something more serious make sure the guys writing you here are aware. Should you find that diamond in the rough then at least he will be aware of some of your sexual needs. As for dating off of here...well not really, but I haven't exactly had much luck in the world or any other site to be honest. I'm thinking of becoming a monk  
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I have had success here finding someone to get serious with, and I don't need to spell it out but if you can rock a mans world sexually he will get attached if you allow it, so I don't ever believe that having a sex history on here will prevent attachment or relationships from forming. It happens. I did have some success on the mainstream M site before as well. Aut viam inveniam aut faciam Tips for Guys to Meet Women  Things i miss most about relationships
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I had SHIT luck whenever I tried actually using this site for dating purposes. BUT I had much-much-much-much worse luck on the vanilla sites, so if you are going to try meeting a guy for a relationship, I think you are right in doing it here. (The women FAR outnumber the men AND they have a tendency to be a bit more truthful about what they really want.) I'd be VERY blunt about what you want. You are on here seeking a long-term relationship. You chose this site, because you value sex as an important aspect of a relationship, and it is easier to discuss those matters in this forum than on one of the more mainstream dating sites. I disagree with what Doc says about "if you rock a mans world sexually he will get attached if you allow it" - that hasn't been my experience. I have found that my mere presence here, and having "friends" in my "network" - has led kinda skittish men to believe that I was sleeping with ALL of the guys in my network. (For that reason, I would NEVER have testimonials on my profile or leave a testimonial in any other capacity, than as a friend.) When I was initially dating, my blog was for the entertainment of others ... but later on, when I started using it as a bit of a diary for my sexual adventures or told stories about my actual experiences, I have had it thrown up in my face BIG TIME. I've had guys I dated JUDGE me and criticize, even when they admitted that they'd had more sex partners in much more "nasty" situations than anything I'd ever done. There really aren't a lot of guys as open-minded to "having a serious relationship with a slut" as Doc is. (No offense to him. But he has said that he isn't put off by women with pictures of men penetrating them on their profiles - and my overwhelming experience is that about 90% of men who might be potentially looking for a woman for a relationship were COMPLETELY put-off by the mere fact that I had nude pictures here. Even though I never had pics of myself with other men OR photos of my vag.) So - good luck. Be ready to purge your blog of stuff you don't want to bite you in the ass.
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All great comments guys! Thank you so much
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Simple! State you case as you do in your blog. What you are looking for is either here on this site (and hopefully local) or it's not. Then sit back and let serendipity do its thing.  It's not fun to wait for it to happen, but it's how it works; you already know that... I just thought I would remind you. I not like you could go out and manufacture what you want. Find pleasure in giving pleasure
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I think the best way to go about it is to state it clearly. Be specific in what you want and don't waiver from that. "Less than casual" can mean many different things to many different people. So know exactly what you want before hand. That is the obvious. But more importantly, you have to be sure in your own mind that that is what you want and be ready to accept a "more than casual" relationship and embrace it if it comes along. The worst thing would be to find what you say your looking for and then realize that's not really what you wanted after all.
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Ok, since I had a 10 year relationship off this site I say it is very possible. You just have to be picky, change your profile to reflect what you are looking for, and then start weeding out the chaff from the wheat. It will take time, but it can be done. Don't give up, don't settle, don't change who you are.
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No idea, try your best. Kisses
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