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Blogs > MBm2fWidow > The Widow's Watch

Looking For A Pretty Amazing Person  

MBm2fWidow 70T
118 posts
2/18/2018 7:36 pm
Looking For A Pretty Amazing Person
Hi ya’ll … I sincerely hope you find that pretty amazing person that you are looking for on this site. 

I am The Widow. I am retired ... my husband died in 2012, at home, in bed, beside me, while we or I should say, I, slept. It was traumatic to find him the next morning as I tried to wake him for breakfast. We had been married for 11 years ... we were like two peas in a pod.

Two years afterwards I met a guy who was a successful web developer from NC who built and maintained websites for musicians. Our friendship and lovemaking gradually helped bring me out from the trauma I had experienced. For the next two years we enjoyed each other as he opened my mind and my heart to living once again.

At the end of July he was diagnosed with Stage 4 liver cancer that had spread to his lungs and died less than 2 months afterwards. Just like that!

These deaths have had a great impact on me and my life .. as much as I want to find companionship and love .... I am messed up. 

I am pretending on camera .... I smile and laugh and keep myself entertained by the attention and the fans. I enjoy the makeup ... the wigs ... the music ... the dance movement ....the escape and fantasy of it all. I enjoy being sexy and looking sexy but it does not sexually excite me ... it just makes the loneliness less real .....the compliments and attention is fun and it makes me feel alive ... but honestly, I cannot imagine meeting anyone.

I think what you might have stumbled on is more like pretty sad as opposed to pretty amazing ..... B.

MBm2fWidow
Reddiplay 64M
4 posts
12/5/2020 8:38 am

 B.,
I am so sorry for your losses, my deepest condolences 💐, I cannot for even a second try to imagine the pain and misery that you must be going through. I will only say this, if you haven’t tried therapy or have and it sucked keep trying until you find the right therapist for your issues. There is a therapeutic treatment for everyone. I know, I have been there for PTSD. I won’t get into my story this is for you so find someone girl, it can help you turn your world from grey to blue. I would never, I mean NEVER give anyone advice on any issue, exception, this one. Please do this! As far as finding someone on this site I have been looking nonstop everyday for 28 days. That is a lot of profiles. I made a few connections and talked to a few girls and gurls. Nothing serious, not yet at least, your story is so amazing and who knows. That special girl might be closer than I think and I just don’t know it. 😉 😘 Tom


dwm45 60M  
1 post
5/19/2018 12:03 am

 so sorry for the pain from loosing two loves. Just keep remembering all the great times you had with two love of your life treasure the memories. i'm sure you will find someone to enjoy life again until then just do what makes you happiest.

love you always!!!


DDreams524 71M

3/25/2018 5:54 pm

 I do hope you find happiness and Love again. You have such a beautiful smile and body to needs to nurtured and cared for with much love and joy. Hugs.


wantingu4funtime 55M
1 post
3/23/2018 12:29 am

 I know life has its trials, but you will be stronger and love more than you have ever before... I hope you find someone, like we are all looking for


Dustman58422 38M
11 posts
2/28/2018 8:56 pm

 yes i really agree with you on all points


caseyt8 71T

2/24/2018 1:42 pm

 Sorry to hear about your losses. I understand as I until recently I did not begin to allow myself the opportunity to begin to grieve the loss of my mom. She died a number of years ago, but I stuffed it and refused to allow myself to grieve. So I understand messed up. You are an amazing and Beautiful woman, I Love your images and post. Hugs, please accept my friendship and LOVE.


DDreams524 71M

2/24/2018 1:28 pm

 Dear you have my condolences for your losses. I understand as I until recently I did not begin to allow myself the opportunity to begin to grieve the loss of my mom. She died a number of years ago, but I stuffed it and refused to allow myself to grieve. So I understand messed up. You are an amazing and Beautiful woman, I Love your images and post. Hugs.


rr45044 68M  
53 posts
2/20/2018 7:28 am

 I'd say pretty amazing is still the label for you - especially where you are in your life now - my condolences on your loss and let me tell you you'll always be my favorite !


OpenmindedinY 50M
188 posts
2/18/2018 9:38 pm

 Hm wow that is the most personally Post Comment i've seen since being on this site. I give you a tone of credit and much more. You seem like a very good hearted person and such. Best thing you can do is live life the best you can. try not to carry so much on your shoulders.


rusty20055 68M
642 posts
2/18/2018 7:53 pm

 You are still a beautiful person.


sphxdiver 74M
21063 posts
2/18/2018 7:51 pm

 Having lost a spouse myself, I know what your going through.

One thing I have figured out, there is no closure, as the term gets thrown around a lot, and seems to be a lot of people's catch-phrase on such things.

Thing is, you live different, outlook, damn near everything changes.

Just have to try and maintain a good outlook, I do wish you the best too !!


MBm2fWidow replies on 2/18/2018 8:10 pm:
Thank you. You often have helped with your understanding and your words. I appreciate your insight.

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