Just an idea
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Posted:Dec 6, 2007 12:55 am
Last Updated:May 30, 2024 9:53 am
1234 Views
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I was thinking recently about this whole writing online thing. I know I am not a fantastic writer, but I am pretty ok. Blogs are nothing more than thoughts and opinions, so why not share them?
So here goes: How do you feel about the idea of sharing blog topics. Everyone write on the same idea, but from their own unique take.
Also if you would like to see me (or anyone else) write on a topic, what would you like to see?
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What I want.
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Posted:Dec 3, 2007 5:46 pm
Last Updated:Dec 14, 2011 11:37 am
1278 Views
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I want hot, passionate, rough, violent sex. I want a battle of dominance. Take my pleasure. Make her feel the pleasure. Hold off. Make her cum again and again. Claw marks down my back. Sweat rolling off our bodies.
I want to give into the animal. Savor the sensations of the moment. The rising tide that sweeps both of us away into a maelstrom. Nothing but the moment matters. Nothing but the pleasure that can come from the instant.
The scent of her arousal. The taste of her sweat on her skin. The feel of her body writhing under me. The sounds of her pleasure. The sight of her surrender.
I want the tenderness. I want the slow and gentle. Spanning more than a moment. Reaching across time. Just acting out the emotions you feel. Almost seeing the spiritual connection grow.
A slow, unstoppable flow. Like a river inexorably flowing to the ocean. Springing forth with a life of its own as the timeless dance continues.
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Late night confessions
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Posted:Nov 30, 2007 11:08 pm
Last Updated:Dec 19, 2008 11:54 pm
1414 Views
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I have no idea why I am blogging at this hour. To be honest with you, I guess it is because I feel that there are things that I need to say.
Late night is such a wonderful time. It is a chance for me to get a clean grasp on the random thoughts that have been running through my head all day. It is quiet and peaceful... with that underlaying hint of mystery that makes each moment just a little dangerous... a little taboo.
Isnt that what life is about? Pushing limits? How can you claim to be alive if you have never lived?
Take a chance. Let it ride one more time. Ask the girl. Stand up.
That is what makes us alive. I could go through my life safely. Never taking a chance, never trying something new, never risking anything.
I would be safe. I would never hurt. I would just live in a little cocoon and never escape.
I did that for a while. Then I joined the military. Talk about a life changing experience. Wow! For the first time in my life I was forced out of my little safe zone into something that I was totally unprepared for. It scared me, and it changed me. I came back a stronger person than when I left. My vision was clearer and I now have more of a spine than when I left. I am someone that I am proud of. I use to talk about honor, and now I have the paperwork to prove it. I use to talk about being responsible, but now I can show you why you should trust me to handle the situation.
Is that the route to self discovery everyone needs to take? No. Everyone has their own path to Enlightenment that they must first find and then follow. I cannot guide you up the mountain. I can show you the path I took. I can help you avoid the pitfalls that ensnare me. I can pick you up when you fall down. I can do all of that, but I cannot take the steps for you. I have to take my own.
I can say though, that I have some wonderful friends. Two of my dearest friends (Beth and Josh) have stood by me through the dark crap that my ex put me through. I cracked earlier this week Muah. I answered her call. I was responsible for her being in a foul mood because she hadnt talked to me. The fact that her life was falling apart was my fault, and she wanted me to fix it. I put her to sleep (somehow I always am able to do that... I am not sure that is a good thing...being able to put people to sleep)< and then I sent Beth and Josh a text telling them I needed them. Beth, bless her soul, called me before I had set my phone down all the way. Talked me through the hurt that had surfaced again. Hell she had me talk to her new boyfriend (whom, while I dont 100% endorse, I see some serious potential in. Hell he thanked ME for being BETHs friend! He was glad we are close so she wouldnt be alone when she moves to TX. They bailed me out of an emotional hurt and then THANKED ME! I still feel low about that.) to help me make sense of how badly I am (STIL being used. Josh called me as soon as he landed.
Anyways, I am glad it's late.
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Random wonderings
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Posted:Nov 30, 2007 9:40 pm
Last Updated:May 30, 2024 9:53 am
1264 Views
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There have been a lot of things I have wondered about recently.
1)Why do girls/women wear pants with writing on the ass? I can understand adult women wearing something like the wonderful "Feeling Lucky" sweatpants. But why am I seeing Jr. High and HS girls wearing shorts and such like that? As an avowed bibliphile, my eyes automatically are drawn to the written word. I feel like such a perv after I catch myself reading Jailbait butt.
2)When did the little black dress lose out to the little plad skirt as the outfit of choice for seduction? I know why I like the little schoolgirl outfit. I like the idea of corrupting an "innocent". I also like the little black dress though. I like the classy, glam look. I appreciate the effort that she makes to make herself beautiful for me.
3) Why do guys brag about their penis size? Does it really matter that much? I know what I am packing, and I have never had a complaint that I know of. I guess part of it is due to the whole "Male Dominance" thing. But, guys, lets be honest, we aren't competing for resources anymore. Besides, there are other ways to get and keep a woman. Not to self promote, but read my blog on touching if you need to know more. Lets be honest shall we? Just because you are packing a destroyer in your pants doesnt mean you are a good lover. It just means it takes longer for you to get ready for action.
4)Where the hell did the whole military attraction go? When I joined up I was told that the uniform would be a chick magnet. I was lied to! Then again, that doesnt suprise me, my recruiter lied about a lot of things....
I will probably put more random wonderings on here later.
Pax
D
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The Fine Line between Making Love and Having Sex
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Posted:Nov 30, 2007 9:09 pm
Last Updated:Jul 1, 2008 8:36 am
1525 Views
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Maybe I am a relic from a bygone era, but I believe that there is a line between making love and having sex. For something as remarkably similar as these two acts are, to me at least there are some very clear cut differences. In my mind at least you need to have both to be a good relationship.
Having sex: its pure physical. Sure, you can say some lovely dovey stuff, but by and large its all about just getting the physical pleasure from your partner. You fuck. You let all of your deviances and kinks run wild. Its pure. Its animalistic. Its hot, sweaty, and raunchy. Its roleplay. Its disciple. The focus of having sex is to cum. Either to get your cum or make your partner cum. It is power and pleasure rolled into one exhausting package.
Making Love: This is sooo different. True you go through the same motions but the spirit of the act is what sets it apart in my mind. For me, when I am making love, it doesnt matter if I cum or not. I really dont care about that. I want her to get hers. I want her to feel, if only for a moment, the joy she brings into my life just by being there. It, to me, is a physical expression of my emotional connection to this person. The act isn't important. The act is just a medium to carry the feelings.
I am a guy. My pemis does not have a little Jimminy Cricket giving it moral advice. I can 'just fuck'. I don't like to. Sometimes I need to. I prefer to make love. It makes it better for me if I care about my partner instead of just using her as a mastabatory aide. I value the spiritual link that develops from moment of opening up to my partner fully. Offering them my mind, body, and soul and feel as we move together that she is doing the same for me.
The best sexual advice I have ever gotten was given to me by the (then) Head of the Psychology Department at Abilene Christian University (he was also the preacher at a local Church.)
"Talk to your partner. Know what your partner likes and what feels good to them. Do what your partner likes and have a partner do what you enjoy. That way you are both getting what you want, and not having to work for it."
Maybe I am a little weird...
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The Theory of Emotional Investment
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Posted:Nov 25, 2007 6:34 am
Last Updated:Dec 14, 2011 11:37 am
1415 Views
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Preface:
There is nothing scientific about this. This is simply based on my own observations and my attempts to make sense of the nonsense that I see. Furthermore, while I have been living my life in accordance to this theory for some time now, I have only within the past several years actually been able to put it into words. Please forgive me in advance for things not making sense.
Ok, now that I have said that, let me begin. The Theory of Emotional Investment states: A person has only a finite amount of emotional value that he/she can invest into other people. As you associate with people, you surrender a small portion of your emotional reserve to that person during the interaction. Likewise the other person surrenders a portion of their emotion to you in return.
That almost sounded academic! Let me break this down into layman’s terms so I can understand what I am writing (lol).
Every human being is like a company. We have “stocks” that can be bought by others. Now, I am not saying that everyone is for sale, but what I am saying is that people can buy an interest in our lives. The currency for these transactions is emotion. We each also have a checking account (for lack of a better term) that has a certain amount of emotion in it. As we associate with people, we spend small amounts of our emotion to by “stock” in that person. We figuratively become invested in that person. In return, that person “spends” their emotion on buying “stock” in us.
Normally this is a zero transaction. What I mean by that is that you receive exactly the same amount of emotion that you invest into the other person. At the end of the encounter you are no richer or poorer (emotionally speaking).
The problem with this occurs when you have unequal investments. An unequal investment is where you put more of your emotion into another person than you get back from that person. This wouldn't normally be a problem, but each person only has a finite amount of emotion. They can never exceed a certain value. If you recieve a transation that puts you over the value, then you "burn" the excess emotion off as a mood swing.
An unequal transaction occurs when you commit more emotion to a person than they are willing to commit to you. There are a lot of factors that can lead to this.
Lack of communication (expressing how you feel.. one way or another), a lack of reciprocated investment desire or capability, and just being stupid are the top three reasons for this.
There are other factors that can affect a person's emotional "capital" (to continue with the money analogy). Many external factors can cause a flux in the amount of emotion you have to give. Stress, physical condition, mental condition, and pets are most likely to affect your emotional capital. Of the major environmental factors, only pets tend to be a positive change.
MY ADVICE:
Based on this Theory, which I admit is still in work, I have the following advice for just about everyone out there:
1) Be sure of the status of your relationship. Do not invest 1000 emotional dollars in someone who can only give you 5 emotional dollars back.
2)Learn good stress management techniques.
3)Don't waste your emotional capital on negative emotions. You only have so much to give, so why put it into something unproductive and hurtful?
4)Get a pet... they love you unconditionally.
Next post I think I will talk about relationships and how you invest in them.
D
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Thanksgiving
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Posted:Nov 22, 2007 8:17 pm
Last Updated:May 30, 2024 9:53 am
1236 Views
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The hardest time I have ever had during my tour of duty was from mid November to mid Janurary every year. That is the timeframe that has Thanksgiving, Christmas and my Birthday. All three of those are big events for my family.
Now that I am back home, it is a real relief to be able to go over to my parents house and spend time with the family... eat some good food...and just relax.
More than anything, that is what I am thankful for. I am thankful that I get to spend the 'Family" holidays with my family again.
Having said that... I have two requests of anyone who reads this:
1) That you remember the Men and Women of the US Military the next time you go before the Almighty. I can tell you from personal experience that it is kinda sad when the highlight of your holiday is a 15 minute call to your loved ones. Some of them dont even get that.
2) Post a comment back. Tell me what you are most thankful for.
D
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Davemart Logos
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Posted:Nov 14, 2007 8:18 am
Last Updated:May 30, 2024 9:53 am
1232 Views
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The below are copyrighted slogans for DaveMart(tm). Usage of any logo in a way not expressly permitted by the DaveMart(tm) Board of Trustees will be dealt with by summary execution of the offending individual... and their family... and possibly a family or two that we see along the way.
DaveMart----we're bringing Sexy Back!
DaveMart----Only thing more insane that our prices is our employees!
DaveMart----Prices lower than a drunk man's standards!
DaveMart-----Our prices are low because the voices in our heads just cant agree!
DaveMart----we have an Aisle JUST TO BEAT YOUR !
DaveMart-----shop smart, Shop DaveMart--
DaveMart----Dumbing the world down, one shopper at a time.
DaveMart----from makeup to Beer… we have ALL your beauty needs!
DaveMart----shop with us, or a puppy dies!
DaveMart----We have more than just Boomsticks!
DaveMart----Changing the way you look at your Cousin (Arkansas ONLY!)
DaveMart----Ask about our Black Market specials
DaveMart----your sacrificial Virgin superstore!
DaveMart----using slave labor and passing the savings on to you!
DaveMart--- Our prices and our board are both Criminal! --> -->
DaveMart----Now hiring Vikings!
DaveMart----your Mail order Bride Headquarters
DaveMart----Now carrying Soyulent Green
DaveMart----proud sponsor of the Kenny G-- 666 tour
DaveMart----Dahmer Dietary Association approved Delis are in select stores
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The Art of Touch
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Posted:Oct 26, 2007 2:09 am
Last Updated:Dec 19, 2008 11:56 pm
1375 Views
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Ok, I will be honest. This is a very spur-of-the-moment kinda post. I was laying in bed with Hime (my cat. Her name is Japanese for Princess...because she is such a little diva)petting her, and I came to a realization. When I pet her, its very similar to how I touch a woman. Now, before anyone gets too weirded out by that, let me explain.
There are certain protocols involved in touching your partner in a sensual manner. They are, frighteningly enough, very similar to how you stroke a cat. When you are petting a cat, you use a very light and gentle touch. You also move your hands slower along the body of a cat. If you don't, it tends to piss the cat off. A pissed off cat will either bite you or leave.
Given that in bed, biting isn't ALWAYS a bad thing, the thing we want to avoid is having our partner leave. Therefore, I have come up with some spur of the moment rules. Keep in mind, this isnt for all situations. We all know that there are times when all that is called for is a good hard fucking. Sometimes though, we want more. That is where the touching comes in. As human beings we NEED to touch other people (look up 'Skin Hunger' sometime. You will be amazed at what happens to humans who are denied physical contact with other humans.)
Touching is probably one of the most important things we can do with a partner. It reaffirms the physical and emotional connection to one another. It expresses feeling and emotions on a much deeper level than just words do. It also acts as a major stimulus, arousing our partners and preparing them for the eventual final act (for lack of a better phrase).
Rule One: Listen to your Partner's Body. Physical contact with another human being gives you an amazing insight into their mental/physical/emotional status if you know where and how to read the signs. When your partner is tenser, a little more pressure is called for. (this could make me have to do a post on massage eventually!)The goal when your partner is tense is to releave that tension. Good sex is near impossible when one or the other party is physically or emotionally wound up. Answer your partner's internal pressure with external pressure to match the body read you have from them. Verbal and nonverbal clues (such as a posture or positioning shift to make certain areas more accessable or involuntary noises) will guide you. As a prelude to a more gentle evening (or post-coital play) trace the lines of your partner's body. A feather light fingertip touch is all that is required. Ears, temples, jawline, and spine are all good places to start. Progression can take you to the chest and inner thighs. Continue to listen to your partner's body and react accordingly.
Rule Two: Take your SDT (Sweet Damn Time): Always, always, always go slow. Don't wipe your partner, caress your partner. Take your time. Use this time to explore your partner's body. Correction on that. Take this time to savor your partner's body like a fine wine or a work of art. Don't rush. Belive me, if you do this right you will have all night to enjoy the pleasures of your partner.
Rule Three: FEED the need, don't just give into the Need
This one is one of the hardest ones for me to really stick to. The more I think about it though, the more sense it makes. Don't give into the ol' sex drive as soon as your partner shows the slightest sign of being receptive. If you are horny, make your partner rage with desire for you... then make 'em stew. It is so easy to drive someone mad with desire while sensually touching them, why waste it? Put your partner well past the point of no return. Trust me, as they beg for you to 'just do it,please!' because they 'can't stand it much longer', know that they are lying. They can take much much more. Keep pushing them onward. Once you do decide to 'give it' to them, they will be so lust driven that YOU might have a hard time hanging on to the ride.
Rule Four: Touch in the Blanks
Just because you both have gotten your cookies doesn't mean the act is always over. In my mind at least, you have just finished the first stage. Post-Coital can sometimes be awkward as you lay there. If it has been even marginal... you might have problems thinking clearly. Don't be afraid to just lay there and hold your partner. Run your fingers up and down their spine or along their body line while you lay there.
These are just some of my personal rules. If anyone has comments, let me know. Who knows... maybe something I have said here might help.
D
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Things never to say to a man
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Posted:Oct 9, 2007 5:39 am
Last Updated:Dec 14, 2011 11:35 am
1602 Views
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A while back I made a post of 40 things to never say to a woman. I have since been challenged to do the same for the guys.
1) (in a girlishly excited voice) It’s so CUTE!!!!
2) Is that a beer gut, or did you eat Mini Me?
3) You can fit in my bra! And four of my friends can fit in your pants.
4) You’re a bigger pain than my period!
5) if you were any hairier, people would accuse me of bestiality!
6) Shut up Chewbacca!
7) Of course I am turning into my mother. SOMEONE has to act like yours!
 And to think, I use to shave my legs for you.
9) *after sex* (singing) ‘All the… small things..”
10) I’ve had better conversations with my dildo!
11) If you were any more of a pussy, you’d bleed
12) are you sure you went through puberty?
13) I am a bitch, yes. One of us has to be a man.
14) Yoko’s husband only CLAIMED to be a walrus. Mine actually IS one
15) Looking at you, I understand why some women go Lesbian.
16) I think my dryer sheets are smarter than you.
17) Are you done yet? There are some commercials I want to watch.
1 *when looking at his check* How sweet, pocket change!
19) *when seeing him naked* is that a wart? You might want to have that taken care of
20) *when seeing him naked* *pointing and laughing*
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Set Me Free
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Posted:Oct 8, 2007 5:30 am
Last Updated:Dec 19, 2008 11:57 pm
1338 Views
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Things with the ex are getting kinda out of hand at the moment. For those of you who don’t know the story here it is:
A couple of months ago my girlfriend (Annie) started talking to a friend of mine named Ben. Ben is stationed in NJ and Annie lives in Tenn. Apparently he called her from a deployment to Portugal and told her he loved her. (I, of course, don’t know this at the time). They start talking and developing a relationship that is more than friends. They decide to tell me over… I was planning on proposing to the girl at the end of the year. For about a month, I was seriously messed up. I don’t want to go into all of the details, but suffice it to say that there are some very dark places a person can go … and I went to most of them.
Anyways here is where it starts to get fucked up. She wont leave me alone. I have some wonderful emails from her telling me how sorry she was that she hurt me. (had a good one from him to… Neither one thought that it would hurt me (“As long as she is happy, you are happy Dave.” “I never meant to hurt you, and I only wish you the brightest and best things in your life” and they both fully expected me to embrace with joy this new love that they found.
This would have had me rolling on the floor in laughter if I wasn’t so busy trying not to cry.
Back to the point. He has been smart enough to leave me alone (except once… which led to a wonderfully cathartic email where I pretty much blasted like the shit rat he is). She, on the other hand, calls me fairly regularly. She calls me when she wants comfort. She calls me when she needs encouragement. She calls me when she is sleepy. She calls me when she is horny.
I have repeatedly asked her, ‘Why don’t you call Ben for any of this?” Her response, (and I quote)’ I don’t trust him enough’.
That, to my mind is just a little fucked up. It gets better
‘Can you see yourself kissing him’–‘Sometimes, not very often. It doesn’t seem right’
‘Can you see yourself sleeping beside him’–‘No, that is your place. With you it’s just a right fit.’
‘Do you love him?’–‘I think so.’
‘Do you love me?’–‘Dave, you know I love you’
‘Do you think that your feelings for him could be transferred from how you feel about me?’–‘ that could be the case’
Now, here is where it gets seriously fucked up ladies and gentlemen. See, this whole situation went down in July. She started trying to get REAL comfy-cozy with me while He was deployed. Then, he got brought back for a ‘Catastrophic Safety Violation’ that caused his 4 month rotation to the desert to end after 1 month. He claims that it will be ok. The situation is nothing to be worried about. He has been saying that the two of them are going to be married… and in fact have set a date for next October… even though he tried to go to Tenn to marry her BEFORE his deployment. She kinda told him no. He also said that she spent 7 October shopping for a wedding ring with her mother, her sister, and two other female relatives.
Now I know at least part of that is BS. (and if you want to know how I know about this… I have friends that are friends with both of them.). Here is what I know is BS.
1) her mother went ring shopping with her: her mother lives in Kansas City … she lives in Memphis . Oh, and her mother HATES him. (Funny story, when her mother found out he was Wiccan, she immediately asked about me!)
2) her sister went ring shopping: She doesn’t have a sister. She has 2 brothers.
3) She went ring shopping: I just have a hard time believing that, because … well… they haven’t met face to face yet.
So, anyway, I am trapped in this drama. I am trying to break free, but I keep being dragged into the middle of it. I am trying to get my life back on track and figure out where I am going to go with it. I don’t seem to be able to. I keep getting pulled into the mix. I know both people involved in that relationship, and I know that it honestly is going to fall apart on them and soon. She needs someone strong, but supportive. She is a weak and wishy/washy person. He is a domineering ass and a liar. He can be a good guy. She is almost as mature as an adult when it comes to taking responsibility and handling crisis. He is almost as mature as a 9 year old boy. (if you cant tell…I really don’t care for him at all)
As I said, I am trying to move on. Part of me needs to hear her tell me (with her own voice) that she doesn’t want to be with me. She has never done that. Another part of me is looking hard and heavy to move on. I mean, I have some very open doors… (I’m not quite hideous you know). I just need some advice. What should I do?
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Things never to say to a Woman
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Posted:Sep 27, 2007 11:23 am
Last Updated:Apr 3, 2008 6:16 am
1179 Views
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) Wow honey! How much do you think we would have to pay to get you boobs like that?
2) Honey, I don't think you are fat. I mean, its all relative. If you were an elephant, you would be the smallest one in the herd!
3) Of course we can pretend. You can pretend I care, and I can pretend you are a mute supermodel.
4) But your sister swallows
5) Shave your pussy! At least it can LOOK teenage tight!
6) Just think of it this way dear, you will never have to worry about sinking!
7) Lets not go to the beach. I don't want the environmentalists trying to push you back into the ocean again.
You are right hun, we shouldn't fight. Lets go to our happy place. I'll be back in an hour.
9) No hun, I am not jealous of your ex lovers. I mean, how could someone be jealous of the New York Jets?
10)*When pulled over by a cop* Show him your boobs hun…. Maybe we can frighten him away!
11) Of course honey, you are very feminine… Almost Bob Saget like.
12) Who let you out of the kitchen?
13) I wouldn't say you are a bitch. That is by FAR to nice a term.
14) *while drinking* could you hold on for a minute? I'm still too sober for you to make sense.
15) Well, we all have our own burdens to bear. Mine is you. Yours is your ass.
16) Are you planning on hibernating this winter?
17) Of course we can get a cat. At least then there would be some friendly pussy in this house.
1 When you die, you want to be cremated and have your ashes spread? Well hell, there goes a year of my life.
19) Quick hun, tell me about your day yesterday! I need a headache so I don't have to go to work today.
20) Your mother should sue George Lucas. She obviously inspired Jabba the Hutt.
21) Hi Bob
22) Please stop with the attitude. You are scaring my unborn
23) And to think I use to masturbate about you… and that is still the best sex I have gotten from you
24) When did you turn into Chewbacca?
25) You are so anal retentive, I am surprised you can take a shit!
26) *looking at her then looking at your penis* I TOLD you we would regret it later!
27) I must have been horrible in my past life!
2 are those real?!?!
29) I like my women like I like my glassware: Pretty, clean, and IN THE KITCHEN
30) It must be midnight, the Bitching hour has begun!
31) of course I love you… I am a masochist
32) *while driving* I know exactly where I am… in hell.
33) I am not surprised you had sex with an entire fraternity. I have to ask though, was it the entire national organization?
34) Wow, how did you get your mustache so thick?
35) There must be a heaven…because being with you is hell.
36) You don't need makeup or flashy clothes for me to think you are beautiful. I have alcohol for that.
37) You cried the first time we made love. I've cried every time since.
3 I'm just here so my buddy can nail your friend
39) Why is the only thing that gets blown around here now my paycheck?
40) *stopping during sex to check her for a pulse*
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